From the Ashes of Hell, Al Bundy Relives His Polk High Days Through the DUD BOWL!
Dec 02 2016 6 Comments
When most people look back at their lives, many consider getting married to be one of their greatest moments. Since Al Bundy married Peg, we all know that is not his. Clearly, scoring 4 TD's in the state championship game for the Polk High Panthers is the moment that he will cherish as his best. But what happens when someone challenges his legacy? Al fights back Bundy style and then epically fails in a way that only Al can do.
After one of Al's Polk High teammates, Skippy, dies, Al mourns his loss at a funeral held in a sports bar and wishes he had a chance to do a touchdown celebration.
"If I was going to name my all Bundy Dream Team, every guy on it would have to know how to party in the end zone. I'd come up with my own little celebration in the end zone...what I wouldn't have given just to be able to spike the ball just one time, oh well, I guess I'll have to settle for being on the greatest undefeated team in the city history."
Just at that moment Jack Franklin, a player for George S. Patton High, the only other undefeated team in the city in 1967, enters the bar. Polk High and Patton High were destined to play in that fateful year, but the game was cancelled because Patton High had players who 25 or 30 years. The best part of the rivalry is that George S. Patton High had its name changed to Jackyln Onassis High - the teams new name is the Jackie O. First Ladies. Of course the confrontation evolves into a rematch to settle the feud and preserve the Polk High legacy.
"The pride of the team is at stake here Peg. I even think I am going to break my old record Peg, and this time I am going to spike the ball," states Al confidently.
Bundy trumpets the call to action for his old teammates, only to find out his old quarterback, Thad, is now a woman. Jack Franklin shows up with his cronies and Thad knocks him out, proving that he still has his old arm.
As the game starts, one of Al's Polk High teammates says "Hey Al, don't some of those First Ladies seem big to you," and Al responds "well age will do that. Look at Barbara Bush." The games starts with Al getting crushed returning a kick. Things get more suspicious when Bud, who is the referee, finds a super bowl ring on the field that belongs to one of the First Ladies.
As the game progresses, the Polk High players begin to notice that the past First Lady player Morty Fishbine looks a lot like Lawrence Taylor and little Eddie Amin looks a lot like Bubba Smith.
Al reassures the Polk High players by saying, "There's nobody over there but pink punks and what do Polk High Panthers do to pink punks, Pulverize the Powder puffs."
The game is a disaster as Polk High is getting destroyed 91 to 0. The game looks all but lost, but then Eddie Amin's wife comes to the field and reveals he is Bubba Smith. Soon the rest of the First Lady's wives show up revealing the ruse.
"Franklin you cheating pink weenie. So you did use ringers," says Al and Franklin responds "you guys couldn't score with your wives." Al responds that he is proud of that and challenges Franklin to a sudden death show down and says that if he doesn't personally score, he will dance totally nude at the sports bar in front of everybody...except Thad and Peg.
Al proceeds to catch a bomb from Thad, breaks two tackles and runs to the end zone high stepping and spikes the ball only to find out that he is on the five yard line. The next thing we see is Al dancing in the sports bar with Thad waiving dollars in the air.
Although Al didn't win, he did defend the prestige that is the greatest accomplishment in sports history...Four Touchdowns in One Game!
Show Off Your Polk High Pride
6 comments
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